When It Comes…unexpectedly

For those who sit, wait, & wonder…to see it come may seem exciting, thrilling, and reassuring, but the magic of letting it happen unexpectedly just isn’t there.

For some it comes like a theif in the night, waiting until you’ve fallen fast asleep in that position that took you so long to find and become comfortable with.

For some it sneeks inside, like the rain that somehow finds its way through the cracks of your window seal onto its pane.

For Me, well let’s just say it smack me dead in the face like a car going 80 down the wrong way of the Dan Ryan Expressway! (Lol)

No flashing lights, No warnings, No signals nor signs…Just me. Standing there in a daze mezmerized by its presence that lays so closely near.
Something so near that was once SO far away…so beneath the surface, so far buried that only ones death could seemingly put them closer being 6ft under ground.

Its something that’s synthetically been there before, with just a different apperance, different approach, different plan, and different outcome. 

Some call it crazy, most call it fate…

…I’ll just call “it” Love in the meantime.

With a settled heart,

-Kiara Ann

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To Be or Not To Be…

Welp, having options is nice, always seems better than having no options.

That is until you don’t know how to choose.

Word from the wise…patience is key. Give things time, people usual hang themselves if you just be still and watch.

Be free with how you feel, speak up, but sparingly.
And always allow someone to show with.their actions…NOT their words.

Be happy, Be free, & Live it Up!!!

-Kiara Ann

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A Brief and Brutally True Reflection on my Women’s Studies Course

IT WAS TOTALLY AWESOME!!! LOL

About two summers ago I took a Women Studies course at Southern Illinois University Carbondale, under the instruction of a lady named Kate Gramlich. Little did I know that summer would take me on a rollercoaster ride, ending up with me labeling my self as a feminist, becoming more cultured with womens activism, and sticking it to the “man,” by going a whole month without shaving my legs. A WHOLE MONTH IN THE SUMMER WHILE STILL WEARING SHORTS! AHH unbelievable I know. But here’s the thing, this teacher not only taught the women’s studies course but lived it. Which is what brought me back, sitting in the front row of yet another Women’s Studies course under her instruction.

WMST 491 Cyber-feminism, was the most influential, provocative, yet laid back course I have ever taken and the crazy part is, with little structure and a shocking low amount of major assignments, I have to say that this is one of the classes in 4 years that I feel I will take the most from. We learned the ins and outs of how feminism functions and lives in the virtual world. How women (and men) build their fan base, the type of articles they write, and I didnt know what the heck being “child-free” was about. (If you don’t know, I’d encourage you to look it up, pretty amazing and legit stuff) Nevertheless, in a class with only 7 students, I swear we discussed more with 7 than my Sociology class with about 35. :-O Yep, I’d have to say a huge part of that has to do with the inviting nature that Kate lets off in all of her class, I mean for goodness sake I added her on Facebook. Who adds teacher onto their personal Facebook page? Exactly! And I know what you may be thinking, the teacher had a professional page…aaahhaa, NO she added us to her personal page, and you wouldn’t believe how often this woman updates, its pretty awesome.

 

So why am I going on and on about this course and this teacher named Kate….Because it “fuckin” rocked!!! I always felt happy going to the class and typing posts for it on my blog. It also is an amazing feeling when you can be open and honest in a class and a teacher not judge you.

On another note: I’m a little bummed that she’s moving to Kansas in a few days, HOWEVER, toooo excited I am one out of a tone here in Carbondale that is actually from Kansas City. Gonna have to take a couple of random trips home to catch up with family and check in on my once teacher, but more like friend Ms. Gramlich and her adorable kittens.

 

By far this course, woman, and blog post is the most exciting that I’ve posted in a while. Don’t think too many more of these will come. But then again I graduate in 10 days…So no more BORING TEACHERS!!! Woot Woot.

 

Until Next Time,

 

Peace, Love, & Feminism,

 

-Kiara Ann

An Expressional Piece

To Guy in the Back with the Tiny Tee & Sox Cap

I appreciate how you’re always around

Even though I only see you in the back of this spot about 3times a year.

Your presence is always nice to notice

When lies seem to always run amuck and negativity is a commonnoun for earth.

I remember so vividly your demeanor

Patient…Subtle…Always minding your own business

Doing your own thing.

Busy.

So busy I can remember,

Yet its crazy how you always seemed to find time to look up

From the back corner of this spot,

Take a breath,

Nod your head my way in acknowledgement

And then get back to business

I have to admit to you

Guy in the back with the tiny tee and Sox cap

I go day by day, living, giving my attention to

School, God, and my ever changing priorities

But you never seem too far from mind

I think about the time I saw you and could refer to you as

The Guy in the Back with the Tiny Pink Polo and the Sox Cap

Laughter still overwhelms my eyes at the thought

Then it slowly seduces my entirety

As I remember the daydream of time spent chatting

The day you walked from the back to the front

Summer of ’09, ’87 Pontiac Prix, Endless road, subtlepossibilities…

Yet seemingly nothing!

but a pure friendship arose from the distance.

And oh how I hate the sight of that sox cap from afar.

But love when you randomly signal me from afar the score ofthe games.

Sox 6-Cubs 3

I’m just happy I decided to sit where I did that day

Because if I hadn’t, I’d of never noticed you

Guy in the back with the tiny tee and Sox cap

And you’d of never looked in my direction

Giving me just a brief second of  visual serenity

Speaking unsaid words.

Ever so rarely

But saying more than you will ever know

…with the silence.

I often daydream about the day that’s its too late

The day you Guy in the back with the tiny tee and Sox Cap

Decides to move from the back of this spot, to another.

I didn’t have the courage

to walk back and ask you to sit near window with me

So your able to look out and realize all the beauty from myview,

So I decided to write you

Leave this letter on your table in the back of my heart,

And just sit and wait til you pass by to read it.

Maybe then you’ll decide to walk over

Formally introduce yourself and ask to sit down a while

Then we’ll finally get the chance to say

What we’ve already silently said from a distance.

I’ll call you my friend in the back with the tiny tee and sox cap

Time. Patience. Truth

You just might correct me one day…

The [My] Guy in the back with the Tiny Tee& Sox Cap

-Kiara Ann

4/23/2012

What I believe should be “Sh*t Black Girls Say”

This video posted a while ago by the young, Emmanuel and Phillip Hudson, has by far reached unexpected numbers. And the second my sisters introduced it to me had just recently seen the video trend “Shit…..Say” And after this, I thought this should definitely been Shit Black Girls Say…so for the WordPress and blog world who hasn’t seen this YouTube video, take a look,comment, like my page, the video and enjoy. I hope these two young men sky-rocket even more, because they have black women on point, or at least some of the slang we really use. lol

Enjoy!

Though its been a while…

…I must say that I have been quite impressed with the quality of my life these past few weeks. Though my online presence has been mute I have gone on to accomplish great things with my education.

I must add that the flow of my WMST 491 class has been one slow yet steady I am eager to present for my final presentation on Pornography…yep I said it, wild, hot, kinky nudes & the many complexities of the sex INDUSTRY! Amongst the subcategories I will touch on are marketing, history, presentation, categories of sex types, & womens power role in it all.

The portion I am most excited about has to be the art of transexual sex forms. Because of the sheer fact of researching a different type of women and the differences in pay, power and submissiveness. I undoubtably beieve this will be by far one of my greatest works of my college career and one to hold dear too. The only obstacle may be showing video in school of sexual acts. I hope my peers have a strong stomach. Lol 🙂

All in all I am excited to be graduating in 6 weeks and beginning my true journey into adulthood.

Hope you follow the ventures now & then…

Until next time, 

-KiaraAnn

This Week for Women’s Studies

Since this weeks topic has been body image, I felt compelled to post a video created by Dove. This video was extraordinary and I wish more people, especially young ladies would watch this and read up more on their magazine model idols.

This video sums things up very nicely…its not REAL!
I hope that this video finds you in peace, and changes the way you may view things.

Until next time,

-Kiara Ann

Up & Coming Singer motivated by Life.

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Marlen Green, stage name MG, 20, of Murphysboro finds relaxation and hopefullness in his vocals and his music. Singing since he was only 7 years old, MG is constantly perfecting his craft, challenging his talents and taking his music to new heights.

 

 

In a recent sit down with MG he opened up about his drive and his future goals.

 

KAnn- So where do you get your motivation for music?

 

MG- Everything, from other artists I see on TV. Like everybody, I don’t have a certain one I can pick just everyone in that industry.

 

KAnn- Why do you do it all?

 

MG-Because I want that life, I want o know what it feels like to be famous. I’m ready.

 

KAnn- So what is your newest song?

 

MG- My newest song is called Better Days.

 

KAnn- So do you write your own music?

 

MG- Yeah, I usually write my own verses, but I can’t take all the credit, my guy Biz, who’s also a song writer helps a lot with ideas and Justin James, a vocalist on a lot of my music helps write.

 

KAnn- So, what’s the next thing you want to do wit your music?

 

MG-I want to get it out there to the World. I want everyone to hear my music.

 

KAnn-What’s the 1st thing you’d do once you got famous?

 

MG-*Laughs*…that’s a hard question to ask. I don’t know what id do when I got famous. I wouldn’t know what to do foreal, Idjust try to take it all in.

 

 

As i wrapped up the interview, I had a chance to listen to MG’s newest song Better Days, and if I must say this young singer has a lot of talent. His songs are so relatable and its safe to say he’s going places.

 

 

To get the first insight and look at MG’s music you can find it on youtube under the name: singermarlengreen91.

 

To get a peek inside of the life of the artist, check him out on Facebook: Marlen Green.

 

 

 

And there you have it…Its been real,

-Kiara Ann

Social Gendering at its BEST

Boy Toys, Girl Toys, and this Misrepresentation of RACE!!!!

Toys R Us "black" doll

Method of Brainwashing….TOYS R’ US!!!

 

During a recent trip to the infamous kids toy store “Toys R Us,” the reality of socialization smacked my dead in the face…gender roles. As I walked down the aisles, looking for a birthday gift for my niece, I realized the only options she had were either, a baby (playing mother), housekeeping and cooking (a maid), and then Barbie ( -__- )

 

In disgust I taunted the idea as I ranted up and down the aisles, my friend Kara stands and laughs, but I really couldn’t believe that sh*t. Why do things have to be this way and what are the options to change it? Well, mid-way through my rant a woman shopper notices and says “I actually bought my son the baby to play with as a child.” I applauded her, because she, one of few, actually tried to break outside of the gendered roles, she went on to say that her belief was that men should also be fit to be nurturing and loving to their children as well. In result her sons are in their 30’s, with children, and are GREAT fathers. I’d say she can pat herself on the back for that. Similar to that I ended up buying my niece a Princess Tiana twirling doll, because her party was themed with princesses, and the doll actually looked decent as far as representation.

 

 

On another note, this doll that I’m holding on the left was HORRIBLE,  our first thought was WOW really, is this what I look like, and my friend though shades darker than me, couldn’t get off the topic of that brillo pad for hair that she was wearing. OUR hair is NOT that f*ucking rough GEEZ people. Quite sad, I just have to show you a close up:

 

Now I will say that they had another “black” Barbie, that seemed a little closer and mellow, but then she was the ONLY one with provocative clothing on with her boobs EXTREMELY exposed. smh Will they ever get it right. It’s not the darker the rougher and shorter the hair, nor is it the lighter the straighter and slutier.

Beyond those main issues, the choices of black to white dolls within this brand is obvious….

Oh and just in case you were wondering here’s the other black barbie alternate:

I thought to myself maybe this is just how they do in store displays, but no no no, online its all the same, they go for the girls when it comes to cooking, cleaning, and taking care of the children…and you would think that it said for girls or for boys, but the representation through COLOR is far too obvious….check out below the age which it starts (Pre-School) What do you think?


With all that said and done, I’m not going to toys r’ us for a while, and when I do, I will definitely not buy into this backwards gender-role for boys and girls.

For WMST 491, and My Peace of Mind,

-Kiara Ann

Interview with a Tween & Teen on Social Networking Sites

 

Hello World,

So yesterday I found myself in the middle of a very fluid discussion in my undergraduate women’s studies course,  about adolescents and social networking sites. I realized that two questions stuck out more vividly than others. One was why do teens or even why did we as teens post certain provocative photos of ourselves? Who were our influences? Why did we or do teens lie about their age?  And two who tells us to do these things?

 

 Anisa (age 9)

  • Do you have any social networking sites? Why? No, because Mom won’t let me.
  • Have you seen or used Facebook before? Yes, on moms page.
  • Do you want one? Why? Yes, So that I can talk to people.
  • What people would you talk to? You (myself), Kida (our sister).
  • So basically your sisters (lol)? Yes.
  • Ok, do you prefer the phone or Facebook? The phone, because it lasts longer. 🙂

Oh, how I love my sister, smart before adolescents. Lol

 Malinda (Age 17)

  • Do you have any social networking sites? Yes, Facebook, Vivo, and Twitter,
  • Who do you talk to on Facebook? Friends
  • Do you know all of your “friends”?  Yeeeees, Kiki!
  • Malinda don’t lie, be for real PLEASE!? Ok, No.
  • Why do you use social networking sites? I just use it, ‘idk’ I just want friends, something to keep me entertained when I’m bored, ya know.
  • Why do you take pictures that show off your body (provocative)? Because they’re cute!
  • Who determines if they’re cute? I ask my friends, both guys and girls and if they say its cute then it goes up on Facebook.
  • What do you prefer phone or Social networking sites? I prefer to text message not talk on phone. Why? Because what if they don’t sound cute. Some people sound ugly or different on the phone than in person or text, so I’d rather not hear they voice. When you text everyone sounds the same.

 BODY IMAGE INFLUENCE:

Oddly enough when I asked both my 9 year old sister and my 17 year old sister about whom they like in terms of body image, I was shocked yet pleased with their answers. I simply said to both, who would you most like your body to look like: Jennifer Hudson before weight loss, Black chic from Glee, OR Beyoncé, Nicki Minaj OR Nicole Richie, Paris Hilton, Lohan OR Tasha Mack, Sanaa Lathan.

To my surprised both of my sisters chose Tasha Mack over Nicki Minaj want to see the differences:

Anisa 9

If you could look like someone who would it be (I named choices)? Tasha Mack 🙂

 

 

 Malinda 17

  • Do you like your body  image? Its cool
  • If you could change something what would it be? my boobs,
  • What would you do make smaller? Yeah, because their too big.
  • Do you feel that’s all that some people look at sometimes? Yeah most of the time.
  • What do you feel your best attribute is? My smile
  • Does the number of ‘likes’ matter to you? Says loudly-YEAH it matters because if it doesn’t get a big number I’m taking it down.

 

 Conclusion:

What was MOST shocking to me is that Malinda is 17 with maybe a size 38DDD bust, plays off of that body image online and receives gratification for it, but it is the main thing about herself that she wishes to change. It just goes to show you that the impression and observant identity matters MORE to teens than self-identity, and it ultimately makes them into the person that they “perceive” to be.

It is my DEEPEST hope that whatever my sisters want to identify themselves as it be positive, and what “they” truly want for themselves and if other people don’t like it…Screw them & lets keep it moving.

 

 

 

For Women’s Studies 491,

Its Been Real!

-Kiara Ann